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"My friend" as form of address
Guest
1
2015/02/20 - 7:47pm

I am checking in at the health club;  the young woman at the counter, a person not familiar to me, says 'Hello, my friend.'  That takes me aback  a little, slightly surprised.  The reason  for my reaction is obvious enough: such expression by a woman!   Yet to think again,  I don't see why that should be anything out of the ordinary.  From how comfortable she seems saying it , it's all but an ordinary way of hers ,  which might well be true of any great many women; and even so of woman just as of man.  Still, I feel  like that is not something one generally expects to hear out of women; that it might be indicative of factors of personal background, culture, profession, etc.  A mental test on famous people:  we're all familiar with "My friend" out of senator McCain;  how about it with Hillary Clinton?  Somehow it doesn't quite fit her.

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2
2015/02/21 - 4:30am

Especially in the South, it isn't uncommon for waitresses to address male diners as sweetheart or honey or darling.

EmmettRedd
859 Posts
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3
2015/02/21 - 5:03am

This book does not list my friend as a mode of address, but gives several examples. The one under "Girl, little" is from a woman's dialog in Ian Fleming's Diamonds Are Forever.

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4
2015/02/21 - 1:29pm

RobertB said: ... we’re all familiar with “My friend” out of senator McCain ...

Yeah, I live in Arizona and he gets a lot of airplay here. Radio and TV. You can't help but notice that "salutation" since it's not that common. Maybe a bit more so among politicos. I always wrote it off to his being surrounded by "not friends" for 6 years of his life. I'm guessing here. I ain't his shrink.

deaconB
744 Posts
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2015/02/21 - 3:36pm

Peano said
Especially in the South, it isn't uncommon for waitresses to address male diners as sweetheart or honey or darling.

When I was confined to a nursing home, I registered a complain about nurses and aides using such elderspeak.  When my complaints were ignored, I asked offenders that it they use the language of truck stop waitresses instead of addressing patients by name as a professional should do, does that mean the want to be treated to a friendly smacks, gooses, and pinches on the rump such as a truck stop waitress gets?  None of them really wanted to answer that.

On the occasion of my fifth complaint to a nurse, she agreed to stop using such terminology, and no more than ten seconds told me that she'd be back in a few seconds to take my blood pressure, addressing me as "honey."  I said, "Sure thing, babe!" and gave her a slight slap on her rump as she headed out the door.

Not recommended.  The patient is immediately branded as sexually aggressive - and need I point out that nurses can write whatever they damned well want in a patient's chart, and it will be thought to be the gospel truth?

Guest
6
2015/02/22 - 3:46pm

deaconB said: On the occasion of my fifth complaint to a nurse, she agreed to stop using such terminology, and no more than ten seconds told me that she’d be back in a few seconds to take my blood pressure, addressing me as “honey.”  I said, “Sure thing, babe!” and gave her a slight slap on her rump as she headed out the door.

LOL, but man, that was risky. Saying "Sure thing, babe!" was well within acceptable parameters, but the pat on the rump was escalation. I think you got lucky.

I once asked a friend who's an RN about that, since it bugs me too. She said that it was kind of an "standard protocol" when dealing with either very young or very old patients. She didn't define "very." Said it was more about bonding as a care-giver, and less about condescension. I'm not sure I totally buy that, but I didn't want to get into a long discussion at the time.

Guest
7
2015/02/23 - 5:17am

Returning to RobertB's original observation, I agree that my friend, buddy, pal, chum, bud, and possibly others I'm not thinking of, all seem somewhat marked for a male speaker.

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