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Too much sugar for a dime
Guest
21
2011/01/15 - 7:19pm

How's this? "I don't believe in reincarnation. I used to, but that was in a previous life". Not sure if it qualifies as a paraprosdokian though.

Guest
22
2011/01/15 - 9:45pm

One more that I like:

"One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know."

Ron Draney
721 Posts
(Offline)
23
2011/01/15 - 10:26pm

tunawrites, you're going to love this. (And who knows, it may start a discussion on "famous quotes that everybody gets wrong".)

Guest
24
2011/01/16 - 11:32am

Grant deftly handled the “Democrat versus Democratic” listener question in the “Too Much Sugar for a Dime” episode. Grant could have added that, by extension, "Republican" would be back-clipped to "Republic."

Birling's as easy
As falling off a log.
The conceptually challenged
Need a seeing eye-to-eye dog.

Guest
25
2011/01/16 - 7:03pm

Ron Draney said:

tunawrites, you're going to love this. (And who knows, it may start a discussion on "famous quotes that everybody gets wrong".)


That's a great clip, Ron. It's interesting to me that I picture the scene from Animal Crackers when I've said the quote, yet I don't think I've ever said the quote correctly. That Groucho was himself wrong about the quote gives me some comfort; at least, I feel as though my past gaffes were a little less egregious.

Guest
26
2011/01/18 - 7:16am

Groucho does not say he is quoting himself. Maybe he is saying the same thing in a different way. We all do that frequently. Why are we saying that he is

    wrong

if the words belong to him? For that matter why would anyone be

    wrong

if they do not state that they are quoting someone?

Guest
27
2011/01/20 - 11:14pm

Dick said:

Groucho does not say he is quoting himself. Maybe he is saying the same thing in a different way. We all do that frequently. Why are we saying that he is

    wrong

if the words belong to him? For that matter why would anyone be

    wrong

if they do not state that they are quoting someone?


It's true that I cannot say that Groucho's later quip was wrong; he may have been simply paraphrasing himself. But, since I have been thinking of the scene in Animal Crackers whenever I've said the quote, that means I'm wrong. Groucho's later quote in another context does not correct my wrongness, but simply acts as a salve.

Guest
28
2011/02/03 - 8:49pm

The discussion of paraprosdokians reminded me of one of my favorites, quoted in several different versions but always attributed to Henry Ford: Whether you think you can, or think you can't, you're usually right.

Guest
29
2012/03/11 - 11:51pm

I went through a list of one-liners I keep around, but I don't think I really have the knack for this.   I kept picking out lines that involved some sudden twist or surprise at the end:

  • Egotist: A person more interested in himself than in me.   -Ambrose Bierce (1749-1832)
  • Even nowadays a man can't step up and kill a woman without feeling just a bit unchivalrous…   -Robert Benchley
  • Westheimer's Discovery:   A couple of months in the laboratory can save a couple of hours in the library.   -Frank H Westheimer, chemistry professor (1912- )
  • Sheep don't fly so much as plummet.   -Anonymous
  • Being famous has its benefits, but fame isn't one of them.   -Larry Wall
  • If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?

But then, almost any humor depends on that, so that these don't seem to be what you're talking about. These are the only two I think really fit the definition:

  • We must believe in free will. We have no choice.
  • If you smoke after sex, you're doing it too fast.

How's that?

EmmettRedd
859 Posts
(Offline)
30
2012/03/23 - 2:56pm

Related to Learning Curve: I heard a presenter in a talk use the phrase, "ahead of the curve." I took it to say the antecedent was advanced.

Emmett

Guest
31
2012/03/23 - 8:22pm

Oh, yeah, I meant to comment on that too:   I agree with both Rick Reid and mcmc.   I've always pictured the learning curve as the amount of time you spend learning a subject plotted on the x axis vs how much you've learned about it on the y axis; thus if it's an easy topic to acquire then you understand it well after only a little effort, the line has a steep slope and the expertise is said to have a steep learning curve.   But no one who's never thought that through says it that way.   I suppose "steep" just brings to mind a difficult climb—the opposite of the real meaning—and that's how the battle was lost.   For lost it is, I'm sure; "steep" will always represent in the unthinking mind a difficult subject, and "shallow" an easy one.

jock123
17 Posts
(Offline)
32
2012/07/16 - 1:29am

Re: the learning curve – I think an issue which has been missed out so far is the question of who has to do the learning. It's all very well for a theorist to sit and plot a graph of what has to be learned or which skill is to be gained, and the amount of time allowed; it's a different matter if you are the ordinary joe suddenly required to pick up a certain amount of knowledge in a time-span over which you have no control…!

Perhaps what has happened is that management, in order to make themselves look more dynamic and efficient, err towards the steep learning curve, as it shows that they and their staff are able to be agile and productive, thinking all the positive attributes that some have posted here. Perhaps no dissembling is involved, and their estimates are just not that good.

However, the workforce, aware of the inexactitude of such estimates, and the extra pressure put upon them to adhere to a flawed plan, see the negative side of things. As there are invariably fewer managers than workers, the negative version is the more prevelant. Which side is correct and which is wrong thus depends on which end of the experiment you are!
I personally am always wary of graphing anything that is subjective and interpretative, as in my experience it adds a veneer of scientific respectibility to something which is after all only a guess.

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