The Secret Language of Families

You’re listening to A Way with Words, I’m Grant Barrett.

And I’m Martha Barnette, and you know, speaking of words, when I was growing up, we Barnette’s had a special family word, and the word was “fubby.”

Now the word “fubby” comes from the fact that our fox terrier was named “Traveler,” but the name “Traveler” was too hard for my little brother Jim to say, it always came out “fubby.”

So whenever my mom wanted to take us on road trips, she’d say to us, “Now I want you two to be good little fubbys.”

I think that my mother probably used the word “fubby” in that particular context, in part because it was a family word, this kind of secret code that got the attention of us little kids.

And Grant, I’m betting that you either had a word like that growing up, or maybe you’re making some now.

Yeah, it’s funny that it was a word that came from the mispronunciation of a sibling, but oh, I don’t know how you get from “Traveler” to “fubby,” that’s quite a distance.

But growing up in my household, you know, with my parents and my four siblings, I don’t remember very many of these words.

There were the odd mispronunciations here and there that we would laugh about, but nothing that really stuck.

But in the household that I’m a co-boss of now, I won’t say it.

Co-boss, I like that.

But the thing is, our son, he’s nine months or so old, and we’re constantly talking to him to get him to talk, you know, trying to get him to say his first word.

The family language that we have is still mostly centered on baby talk, and everybody kind of has their own way of doing baby talk.

And in our house, it’s what we joke about as being unnecessary and ungrammatical plurals.

Now, my wife is a linguist.

I’m a lexicographer.

We work in language day in and day out, but we do it on purpose just to break the rules.

So this is what leads to me calling my son Mr.

Manz’s.

So not only is Manz the wrong plural of man, but then we add another plural, so it’s Manz’s, and I call him Mr.

Manz’s instead of Mr.

Manz.

That’s our family language.

That’s what we do in my house.

Oh, Grant, that’s adorable.

You’re my favorite Wexicagua-foot.

Well, the reason I brought this up is that I was looking at this book of expressions like this collected by author Paul Dixon.

It’s called Family Words, A Dictionary of the Secret Language of Families.

So what are your family words?

If your family has a special word you’d like to share with the rest of the world, a word with maybe a story behind it or a mispronunciation like Grant was talking about, you can always do so in the A Way with Words discussion forum, which you’ll find at waywordradio.org.

And if you’d like to talk about any other kinds of words, call us.

The number is 1-877-929-9673, or email us at any time, the address is words@waywordradio.org.

Hello, you have A Way with Words.

Hello, this is Jessica.

Hello, Jessica, this is Grant and Martha.

What’s going on over there?

Nothing much.

How are you?

All right.

Where are you calling from?

I’m calling from Phoenix.

Well, do you have a question for us today?

I do, I do.

I was calling because I was wondering where the term “knocked up” came from.

Now may we ask what got you thinking about this expression?

Well, I just, I saw the movie and I thought, and I just started thinking to myself, “That is an odd term.

That is odd.”

The movie Knocked Up.

Yeah.

And what’s the basic plot of that?

Well, this girl gets knocked up and she gets pregnant and one night stand and they end up having the baby.

It’s like a love story.

-huh.

-huh.

You have any theories about where that expression might have come from?

No, not at all.

Okay.

Well, I can tell you that since the 16th century, one meaning of the word “knocked up” is to have sex with, and in fact, in the olden days, a knocking shop was a brothel, and there was also an old expression to knock out an apple.

Knocking out an apple meant getting somebody pregnant, so it’s sort of the idea of knocking on a tree and an apple falls out.

Why “knocked up”?

Yeah, well, that’s a good question because if you look up the word “knock” in the dictionary, there are all kinds of different ways that “knock” takes on a different meaning depending on the preposition, right?

You have “knock off,” “knock about,” “knock down,” and then you also have “knock up.”

And at some point, probably in 19th century America, we started using the expression over here “knocked up,” meaning to be pregnant.

And in England, it means something entirely different.

Did you know that?

I didn’t know that.

Yeah.

Well, good.

In case you go to London and spend the night someplace and somebody says, “I’m going to knock you up in the morning,” don’t get alarmed because what they mean is that…

They’re just going to knock on the door, like knock on your door.

That’s right.

Yeah.

Okay.

It’s one of the famous misunderstandings between the two Englishes.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That’s very interesting.

I’m going to go to work and tell everybody.

You are?

Yeah.

This is something we’ve been talking about.

It’s been…

I’m a nurse and it’s a big room of women, and we just talk about these things all the time.

Oh, okay.

Do you write like K-U on the charts?

For the pregnant ladies, you write K-U on the charts.

It’s your own lingo.

That’s pretty good.

I think we probably will now.

That’s funny.

Well, thank you so much for your call, Jessica.

I hope we helped you.

Thank you.

All right.

Bye-bye.

Pleasure talking with you.

Bye-bye.

You too.

Bye.

We talked about pregnant before, that when my wife was pregnant, she and I would often say…

I would say that we are pregnant.

Yeah.

But I don’t think I could ever get away with saying we are knocked up.

That really is just the woman’s position, isn’t it?

Oh, no, that’s interesting.

That’s interesting.

Well, if you have something you’d like to ask us, the number is 1-877-929-9673, or you can e-mail us at words@waywordradio.org.

Hello, you have A Way with Words.

Hello, this is Mike McCoy.

Hi, Mike.

Hi, Mike McCoy.

How you doing?

Where are you calling from?

I’m calling from Wauchula, Florida.

Wauchula, Florida?

Wait a minute.

Isn’t that the cucumber capital of the world?

Yes, it is.

How did you know that?

I lived in central Florida for a while.

Oh, okay.

So why is it the cucumber capital of the world?

I think it’s because we used to grow a lot of cucumbers.

Oh, okay.

Well, that would make sense.

Well, what are you calling about today?

Well, my name is Mike McCoy, and quite often I’ve heard the phrase “the real McCoy.”

Oh, boy, I bet you’ve heard it a lot.

I’ve heard it quite often, yes.

Well, you know, my real name is Grant Hatfield, right?

I’ve heard that quite often, too.

Of course you have.

Predictable.

Every measure of the joke that could be made that you’ve heard, right?

That’s correct.

Oh, man, we promise not to do it anymore.

Yeah, we’re not.

So what is your question today, then, Mike?

Well, I’ve heard there are a number of theories as to where the real McCoy came from, and I was wondering what you guys could find out about that.

What have you heard?

I’ve heard a few.

The one I think it might be is that there was a boxer named Kid McCoy, and I think that was around the turn of the century, and they said he was the real McCoy.

I’ve heard another one that talked about a gentleman that invented the traffic light and said that was the real McCoy, and then there was something about a bootlegger.

I don’t really know for sure what it is.

Right.

Well, what would you say if I told you that none of those theories is the real McCoy?

Well, that’s- Hello.

Yeah, you’re right.

The story about Kid McCoy, the boxer, is the most common one that you hear, although recently there’s been some etymological research to suggest that it comes from an old advertising slogan for whiskey produced in Scotland.

That’s interesting because my great-great, I don’t know which great-grandfather came from Glasgow, Scotland.

Oh, really?

Yeah.

Oh, interesting.

Now, did he change the spelling of his name along the way?

Well, I don’t know.

I think his was McCoy, but I’ve heard “McKay” might be the origin of the name McCoy.

And you spell your name, capital M, lowercase C, capital C, lowercase O-Y, yes?

Correct.

Right.

Okay.

I’m assuming it’s pronounced “McKay,” Grant.

McKay and company Distillers of Edinburgh produced a whiskey, and they used that slogan to advertise the whiskey back in the late 19th century.

The first time that you see the expression “the real McCoy” in the Oxford English Dictionary, it’s from 1856, and it’s “a drappie of the real McKay,” a drop of “the real McKay,” that whiskey.

But it appears it was floating around even before that, and it may go back to a title of Scottish nobility.

The Dictionary of Scots language is online and freely available, and it’s a highly reputable source.

If you look up “McKay,” spelled M-A-C-K-A-Y, you’ll find their notes on this.

It’s really interesting, because it just blows all those other theories right out of the water.

Well, thank you for enlightening me as to where the real McCoy came from, and I’ll be able to tell others that now.

Yes.

Indeed.

All right.

Bye-bye.

Bye.

Thank you.

All right.

Bye-bye.

If you have a new origin of something, we’re the people who can tell you.

Give us a call at 1-877-929-9673, or send us an email to words@waywordradio.org.

Hi, you have A Way with Words.

Hi, this is Amanda calling from Michigan.

Hi.

Hello, Amanda, what’s going on?

Oh, not too much, it’s not been too bad here, it’s kind of weird.

Oh, so it’s only like 12 degrees instead of 10.

Exactly.

Well, what’s going on?

Well, I have a question for you about the difference between “titled” and “entitled.”

I thought it was pretty clear that a book is titled “Gone with the Wind,” and you’re entitled to compensation when you work, but it seems like everyone always says the book “entitled,” and I think that’s wrong, until I went to my dictionary and I looked it up and it said the first definition of “entitled” is to give a title to, so I’m not sure if it is as cut and dried as I thought.

Most style guides, I think, will tell you that you can say either “titled” or “entitled.”

Where people get in trouble is to say, “I’m going to ‘entitle’ my book this.”

Now, I’ll share a secret with you, Amanda, since it’s just you and me and Grant talking.

When I got a little spare time, I was thinking about writing a bestseller, and I’ve been looking at the bestseller list and studying all the elements, so I’m going to write a book that I want to call “How to Get Rich and Thin While Dating Celebrities After Death.”

What do you think?

You’re going to make a million dollars.

Yeah!

Exactly!

Would you like to collaborate with me?

I’d love to.

Okay, okay.

Well, here’s the thing.

You and I are going to title our book “How to Get Rich and Thin While Dating Celebrities After Death.”

We’re not going to “entitle” the book that.

In other words, you can say, “This book is titled ‘How to Get Rich and Thin While Dating Celebrities After Death,'” or you can say, “This book is entitled ‘How to Get Rich and Thin While Dating Celebrities After Death.'”

The difference is that you don’t want to use “entitle” as an active transitive verb when you’re talking about giving a name to something.

Does that make sense?

It certainly does.

That’s really great to know.

Yeah.

I’d still like to think I’m very superior with my grammar, though.

Well, you know what?

I think you’re entitled to think that way.

Oh, excellent.

We’re fine.

And we’re going to title you what, “Queen of Grammar”?

I love that title.

Please give me that title.

So does that work for you, Amanda?

It certainly does.

All right.

Well, we appreciate your calling.

All right.

Thank you.

All right.

Bye-bye.

Bye.

Bye-bye.

So I think that’s a pretty good way to say it, right, Grant?

Titled and entitled work fine if you’re talking about the name of a book, but when you’re talking about an active transitive verb, I’m going to title my book this.

Exactly.

And if you’re uncertain, just go with “titled” and be safe.

Right.

Or don’t write a book at all.

That’s right.

Just call us at 1-877-929-9673.

And you’re also entitled to email us, the address is words@waywordradio.org.

Stay tuned for a word puzzle and more of your calls.

You’re listening to A Way with Words.

I’m Martha Barnette.

And I’m Grant Barrett, and here once again is puzzle man, Greg Pliska.

Hello, Greg.

Hello, Grant.

Hello, Martha.

Well, Greg, what do you have behind your back?

Is that a puzzle?

It is a puzzle, in fact.

That’s an ax handle.

I actually wonder if you remember this old riddle, which goes like this.

The plural word becomes singular when you add an S.

No, what’s the answer?

Well, when I was a kid, the answer I remember is “princes” when you add an S becomes “princess.”

Oh, nice.

So today’s puzzles look at a similar kind of word play, which I call “false plurals.”

These, for our purposes, all our false plurals will be phonetic, which means that the second word will sound like the plural of the first word, but will in fact be a completely new word.

So you’ll have to guess two answers for each puzzle.

Make sense so far?

Yes.

Are you going to give us an example?

Of course I will.

And also, just to keep things lively today, I’m going to give you clues in verse form with blanks where the answers go.

Oh, goody.

So here’s your example.

“Welcome to Hawaii.

Wear this blank.

Enjoy your stay.

You can surf or dive or simply blank around all day.”

So “lay” and “lay”?

“Lay” is the first word, and the second word “s” sounds like the plural.

Of “lay.”

Lay-s.

Lay-s.

There you go.

Of “lay-s.”

You put that “s” or “s” sound in there.

Never mind the “lay” and “lay” confusion.

Yes.

That way I wasn’t going that direction.

This is plural.

So you can wear this “lay,” and then you can “laze” around all day.

I get it.

Yeah, I was going to say, you can’t “moo-moo” around all day.

Well, if you’re a cow, you can.

Just remember as we go through these that the word in the second blank will sound like the plural of the word in the first.

Okay, great.

Okay?

All right.

So here we go.

“I love blank.

I love his fugues.

I hear them every day.

I have a wind-up music blank on which they always play.”

Oh, very good.

“Bock and box,” right?

“Bock and box.”

Exactly.

Grant’s over there writing down Mozart, Vivaldi, Handel, Handel and Handels, right?

Tchaikovsky.

What’s the plural of Prokofiev?

I love “Bock,” exactly, and a wind-up music box.

All righty.

Here’s another.

“In clothing store, in changing room, a blank is often heard because finding outfits in your blank can be sometimes absurd.”

Gee, Grant, I was going to say “zip,” but that — “zip”?

Well, I was thinking the first word was “curse,” but “curses” doesn’t make any sense.

Yeah, no, but you’re on the right track.

It’s a less angry sound, a more resigned sound, like, “Oh —” A sigh and sigh.

A sigh is often heard because finding outfits in your sighs can sometimes be absurd.

I was thinking it might be “thigh” and “thighs,” but that doesn’t make any sense either.

You never hear my thighs in a clothing changing room.

I hope not.

All right, here’s a New York one for you.

“Security at Katz’s Delis tighter than expected.

The pastrami’s under blank and key, the blank’s password protected.”

So it’s “lock” and “locked,” L-O-C-K and L-O-X.

Exactly.

“The pastrami’s under lock and key, the lock’s password protected.”

But who goes to Katz’s for the locks?

I don’t know.

I haven’t been to Katz’s in years.

No, you go for the pastrami if you go.

I was going to say, do you have a San Diego one now?

I have one that’s a little Southern California-ish.

All right.

It’s about as close as I can get.

It’s not even that Southern California-ish, but it references a famous Southern Californian.

Disney’s — Barnetteand Barnette?

Yes, exactly.

It’s all about you, Martha.

Disney’s Fantasia has no works by Strauss, ’cause blank said no blank would be danced by his mouse.

Very good.

Very nice.

Walt and Waltz.

Walt and Waltz, ’cause Waltz said no waltz would be danced by his mouse.

And Strauss, of course, the famous Southern California composer of waltzes.

And going much further afield with the next one.

This one is going to be a little homage, homage, homage.

We did that two weeks ago.

Yeah, we did.

We’ve done that gag over and over again.

All right.

Here you are.

When you’re blank and old, will the stories be told of the two lexicographical studs?

Will you blank in the pastures of way-with-words masters chewing etymological cuds?

Will we graze?

Gray and graze.

When you’re gray and old, will the stories be told of the two lexicographical studs?

Will you graze in the pastures of way-with-words masters chewing etymological cuds?

Yes.

Gray and graze.

Greg, that’s beautiful.

Very nice.

That’s really beautiful.

It kind of brings a tear to your eyes.

It does.

It’s better than gather ye rosebuds.

Well, Greg, thanks a bunch.

You’re very welcome.

I wanted to mention that if you like these puzzles, the National Puzzlers League has a magazine called The Enigma that is filled with burst puzzles like this.

And you can find the NPL at puzzlers.org.

I just had to put that plug in.

We’ll put another link on the website in the discussion forum.

There you go.

Fantastic.

Thanks for coming by today, Greg.

Thank you both.

Great, Greg.

We’ll see you next week, okay?

Okay.

You got it.

All right.

And if you’re puzzling over some aspect of language, call us at 1-877-929-9673.

Or shoot us an email to words@waywordradio.org.

Hello.

You have A Way with Words.

Hello.

This is Rachel from Oceanside.

Hi, Rachel.

How you doing?

I’m doing well.

How are you, Grant?

Groovy.

What’s on your mind today?

Well, I have a friend named Corinne, and we’re sort of word nerds together.

Yay!

And we were curious about the words instantly and instantaneously.

I’ve done a little bit of research, and I can tell that there’s a grammatical difference, but I can’t seem to find anywhere where it tells me exactly where one would be used over the other.

I mean, that would be my question.

That’s the kind of dilemma that only word nerds ever come up with, because other people don’t think that closely about language, do they?

And do you and your friend disagree about it, Rachel?

Well, it’s not so much that we disagree about it, but we can’t seem to agree on anything in particular.

Our feeling is that instantly refers to one thing happening all of a sudden, and possibly instantaneously refers to a number of things that all happen at once, but like I said, I can’t really find anything to confirm that, so we’re just sort of stipulating by ourselves.

Well, Rachel, I mean, really, I think the distinction between those two words is one of those distinctions that’s sort of finer than “frog hair split four ways,” as we say.

Oh, my goodness.

You know, I mean, well, think about it this way.

If you have a really bad headache, and you take a pill, do you want it to work instantly or instantaneously?

I would say I wanted it to work instantly.

Interesting.

You know, I think that this is just a really, really, really fine distinction, because I think I would want it to work instantaneously, and I’m not quite sure why.

Maybe we should have a raise.

I think what you’re saying is there’s not a great deal of difference between the two.

They can be used interchangeably, and any perceived difference between the two is insignificant.

Okay, so if anyone corrects me, I can tell them they’re wrong.

I don’t think you’re ever going to get anyone to correct you.

I don’t think people are — again, like I say, I think congratulations to the word nerds, because you’re thinking about something that most people probably haven’t considered and will never consider, but this is how you get — Maybe there’s a reason.

Well, no.

This is how you get better language.

This is how you speak better and write better by thinking about the blocks of language and how it’s all put together.

I will say, though, that if you look at these two words in a large body of English that’s a corpus of English, you’ll find some interesting things here.

We tend to use — the two most common words used with the word instantly are regretted and recognizable.

Yes, and most of those are used as examples.

Oh, really?

Exactly, and that’s why they use them as examples, because that’s more than half the time when we use the word instantly, we’re either instantly regretting or we’re instantly recognizing.

And then with instantaneously, the far out in front, something like three-quarters of the time, we use the word almost with it, almost instantaneously.

So when we use it most often, we’re not actually talking about true instantaneously.

We’re talking about something a little longer or a little further away than instantaneously.

It’s just kind of an interesting thing that we have these habits as English speakers, a way of further separating the two words in our mind so that even though they are by definition the same in use, we do different things with them, kind of like taking one car to the beach and one car to work, right?

Sure, okay, so it’s more contextual than it is really anything else.

Mm—

All right.

Well, I will instantly be letting my friend know that there’s absolutely no difference.

As far as it goes, there’s no difference.

That’s right.

Okay, well, great.

Thank you guys so much.

Thank you, Rachel.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Have a good day.

It seems like instantaneous gratification about a language question.

I don’t know, Grant.

I think instantaneous to me seems faster.

Well, it is faster, but think about it.

Sometimes this word is going to sound — one word is going to sound more natural than another, and that’s the one that you’re going to pick.

And so the difference here is your habit and not actually the meaning of the word, because the meaning, again, between the two is indistinguishable.

So it’s just a matter of context.

If you have a question about language, you can get instantaneous gratification right here at 1-877-929-9673, or email us.

The address is words@waywordradio.org.

Hello, you have A Way with Words.

He is.

My name is Van from Carlsbad.

Hi, Van.

How you doing?

Oh, I’m fine.

Very good.

And you said you’re from where?

I am a Brazilian.

I’ve lived in the U.S. For about 40 years, and I’ve always been interested in popular expressions and meaning and origin.

That’s the reason of my writing to you about “break a leg” as the way of saying, wishing to somebody or someone, “Good luck.”

It seems the opposite, and I like to talk about it.

I have some opinions, then I have to research the expression and see if my research is in the right direction.

Oh, okay.

So you’re asking about the expression “break a leg,” which theater and movie people use in order to wish each other good luck before they start a performance, right?

Correct.

And today, many people use “break a leg” besides the theater people.

Sometimes you hear people wishing people good luck saying “break a leg,” probably without knowing why they are saying something on the opposite sense than what you wanted to happen.

Mm-mm—

And what theory are you leaning toward, Dan?

Well, I’ve seen so many speculations of the ones that I feel that the right direction is the superstitious origin, because this is one that I see, because I see the term, the expression in German, what they say, “break the neck and leg.”

Right, they say, “Haus und beinbrück.”

And it appears that it is a way to not awaken the evil spirits by saying, “Good luck,” but you know, the spirits will not then be awakened to say something opposite, and then you say something bad.

They are, they don’t perceive your intentions, and in fact, the, you know, the good thing can happen.

Exactly, Van, that’s my sense of it, too, that the idea is that it’s bad luck to wish you good luck.

And probably it comes from what you mentioned, the German “Haus und beinbrück,” the “may you break your neck and your leg.”

Mm—

The best guess we have is that it came into this country from the German conveyed by people who spoke Yiddish, which makes sense because there’s a lot of tradition in Yiddish language of saying something— vaudeville and theater and the like in New York, too, right?

Yeah, right, saying something complementary, and then you say “kinahora,” you know, “no evil eye.”

You don’t want to wish somebody good luck because it’s just testing luck too much.

There are lots of other theories floating around, as you said, like, for example, that when you wish somebody that they’ll break a leg on stage, you’re metaphorically saying, “I hope you have to go out there and take a lot of bows,” and that kind of thing.

Or a long time ago, they would stomp the chairs and the chair legs would break.

Oh, my goodness.

I hadn’t heard that one, but I think your instincts are absolutely correct.

It’s a way of wishing someone well without wishing someone well in a way that’s going to offend the forces of fortune.

Well, I appreciate very much that your input was very nice.

Popular expressions are always neat things that enrich the language, and your program is so nice by doing that.

Oh, thank you so much.

Excellent.

We’re glad to hear it.

Well, to the bane, we’re glad you called.

Thank you very much, and have a very nice day.

Thank you so much.

Okay, ciao.

All right, bye-bye.

Well, we invite you to break your silence and give us a call.

The number is 1-877-929-9673, or email us.

The address is words@waywordradio.org.

Well, Grant, here’s an interesting tidbit from Paul Dixon’s book, Family Words.

There’s a whole entry on family terms for the tube of cardboard inside a roll of toilet paper.

We didn’t have a word for that, did you?

No, we called that the art project.

Well, anyway, speaking of art projects and toilet paper rolls, it turns out a lot of families have names for that particular little thing, which is kind of weird.

Some families, according to this book, call them a dah-dah-dah.

Some people call them a dah-dah or a der-der or a drit-drit.

And one guy told the author, “It’s a musical instrument, and it is played by putting it to the mouth and uttering its real name, ‘hoo-hoo.'”

Well, anyway, get on the horn and give us a hoo-hoo.

The number’s 1-877-929-9673, or email us.

Email you-know-who at words@waywordradio.org.

Hello, you have A Way with Words.

Hi, this is Mike and Hamul.

Mike and Hamul.

Well, what are you calling us about?

I am calling about a phrase that I used and my friends used from about 1965 to ’69 or ’70.

I moved here in ’70 to San Diego, and I’ve never heard anyone down here use it unless I’m with some of my friends from the Bay Area, the Santa Fe, Saratoga, Campbell, Cupertino area, and we’re a bunch of kids going surfing in Santa Cruz.

And the term or the phrase was “loose cap.”

Two words.

Loose cap?

Loose cap.

So how would you use that in a sentence?

Well, actually, I was going down to Mexico with my friend Tom last summer, and everybody was from San Jose, had lived in San Jose and grown up with us in the car, and I said, “Tom, don’t be such a loose cap.”

And Tom was driving down the road in Mexico with a cup of coffee in one hand, one of those dental floss loop things in the other, staring with his knee and looking over his shoulder at us in the backseat and reaching into the cooler to grab a sandwich.

With his fourth arm.

Yeah.

And I’ve actually talked to some of my buddies since I called you guys, and the consensus is it’s a guy who’s not playing with a full deck, it’s someone who’s kind of wild or someone you can’t trust or rely on or should steer clear of because they’ll probably blow at whatever they’re doing.

The other image I have for it is like the hubcap on your car isn’t properly mounted so that the lug bolts just fall out on the street if they come loose, and the hubcap, what it’s supposed to be for, it’s on and it’s metal, and if one of your lug bolts falls off, you can hear it rolling around in there.

So if it’s loose or missing, then you’re in danger of your wheel falling off without any pre-warning.

Mike, you think this is driving related then?

Could it have something to…

That’s one of the things I remember attaching to it as a kid in high school in the late ’60s.

Well, don’t you think that somebody who forgets to put their gas cap back might be likely as well?

Yeah.

Oh, sure.

I mean, these days they’re usually attached to the automobile, but in the old days they came all the way off and you’d put it on the top of the car and you’d feel the thing and sometimes you’d forget to put it back.

Sure.

I don’t think I’ve ever heard the term “loose cap.”

Well, I’d like to hear from our listeners about this.

Maybe other people have heard it, but I sure haven’t and Grant hasn’t, so how about you?

Have you heard the expression “loose cap” before?

The number is 1-877-929-9673 or send us an email to words@waywordradio.org.

We’d love to hear what you have to say about the term “loose cap.”

Yeah, and Mike, thank you.

You’ve been a most effervescent caller.

You have a good day, sir.

You too.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Well, if you have a question or comment about language, give us a call.

The number is 1-877-929-9673 or email us.

The address is words@waywordradio.org.

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You’re listening to A Way with Words.

I’m Grant Barrett.

And I’m Martha Barnette, and it’s time for Slang This, our weekly puzzle about slang.

Today’s contestant is Valerie Lippo from Carlsbad, California.

Valerie, are you there?

I’m here, Martha.

Hiya.

Are you ready?

Hello, Valerie.

Hey.

How are you doing, Grant?

Are you ready to play?

I am ready.

Are you ready to rock and roll?

Yes, I am.

No fear, no trepidation, no?

None whatsoever.

Whoa.

Whoa, Grant.

Are you ready for this, Grant?

Dun, dun, dun.

Okay.

The gauntlet is beneath.

All right.

Well, Valerie, to get past door number one in this challenge, you have to share your favorite slang expression with us.

So what do you have?

My favorite slang expression is actually three words, and let’s see if you know what they mean.

These words are crumb crusher, rug rat, and ankle biter.

Whoa.

I do know.

Do you know how I know?

Because you have one.

I have one, but also I recently wrote a column about slang words, and I had those three in the column.

You did?

Yes, slang words about children.

Yeah.

You can look it up in the Malaysian Star, halfway around the world.

Oh, wow.

How neat.

Yeah.

The Malaysia Star circulation, what, 1.2 million?

But you know what?

I love tight ankles.

I swear they do.

When they’re at that crawling, chewing stage, my son’s around nine months, he’s got three teeth coming in on top, which makes him look weird, but he goes for anything he can.

Just leaps for it, lunges.

And if your ankles are the closest thing, that’s what he takes him by the nose.

Right.

Well, my uncle used to call my brother and me crumb crushers, and I forgot about that as an adult until I had kids of my own.

And then, and also the TV show The Rugrats, and I went, “Oh, yeah.”

My Uncle Jack used to call my brother and me crumb crushers.

Crumb crushers.

C-R-U-M-B?

-huh.

I never heard that one.

Well, you give them a handful of Cheerios, and it’s also almost like they have this magic power to make like a thousand Cheerios out of the 10 that you give them, you know?

Anyway.

All right.

Let’s play this quiz.

All right.

Valerie, here’s how we play.

Grant’s going to present you with a slang term, then he’ll give you three possible examples of how it might be used in a sentence, and only one of those is real.

The other two are something that he just made up.

Okay.

So, Valerie, your task will be to choose which one is really a slang term.

And if you need help, I’ll be right here to puzzle along with you, okay?

All right.

Okay.

Grant, she sounds ready.

All right.

Here we go.

We’ve got two slang expressions for you today, and the first one is “dance at two weddings.”

That’s a phrase, “dance at two weddings.”

And the first clue is A.

Nimitz and MacArthur agreed dancing at two weddings was difficult, but if the U.S. Had to fight in two hemispheres of the world, it would.

Here’s B.

My father’s advice to me when I started dating was, “Find a girl you like and stick with her.

You can’t dance at two weddings.”

And here’s C.

“Listen, I’m telling you.

He says he keeps kosher, but I’ve seen him many a time down at the diner digging into a big fat cheeseburger.

He’s always dancing at two weddings.”

So which one is it, Valerie?

Is it A, fighting a war on two fronts?

Is it B, dating a lot and not settling up for one partner?

Or is it C, breaking the rules of your religion though you claim to follow them?

Well, the slang term doesn’t seem to fit in my mind with two hemispheric wars, because it sounds like a more gentle warning about interpersonal relationships and not so much about, you know, political or historical events.

And the…

Good, good.

I’m liking this.

Yes.

I’m not liking A, and I’m not liking C, because not following your religious or cultural mores, it just doesn’t sound like it would fit with dancing at two weddings.

And so I’m going to go with B.

I think it has to do with, you know, make your choice, bet on your horse, and go with that one.

Sounds like healthy logic to me.

It does, but unfortunately the answer is C.

It is C.

Yeah, I believe it’s a calc from a Yiddish expression.

And I’m not saying that everyone knows this, but it’s more of a colloquial expression than it is slang.

It really does mean trying to have something two ways.

I think my clue for B was probably a little misleading, because it just fit it so well.

You could almost actually just run with that meaning and have it work perfectly well, right?

But the real one is actually C.

It’s to break the rules of your religion, but pretend to everyone else that you’re, you know, you’re a saint.

This next one, I think, is easier, I think.

All right.

So here we go.

Let’s try this one.

It’s another phrase, it’s another phrase, put the big pot in the little pot.

It’s put the big pot in the little pot.

And the first clue is A.

Boys, there’s company coming up the driveway, so tuck in your shirts.

Mama, you best put the big pot in the little pot and set a few more places.

I’ll go out and see who it is.

It sounds like my daddy.

B.

String theory says there are eight kinds of quarks, all with weird names, up, down, charm, strange, bottom, top, big pot and little pot.

According to string theory, if you could put the big pot in the little pot, then time travel would be possible.

And C.

The way I learned long division was called putting the big pot in the little pot.

I spread out all the pots on the kitchen floor, then I stacked an equal number of big pots on top of the little pots.

Of course, this didn’t work at suppertime when mama was cooking.

So, is putting the big pot in the little pot, A.

Stretching a meal to accommodate unexpected guests, is it B.

A theoretical means by which subatomic particles can travel through time, or is it C.

A way of thinking about long division that makes it easier to learn.

Well, you didn’t help me learn long division, that’s for sure, so I’m not going to go with C.

I think that’s a wise choice.

The B sounded so complex, that has a lot of plausibility, simply because of all the detail that you put in the example.

And yet, when I’m thinking about time travel, I’m like, wait a minute, no, that doesn’t make any sense.

So, I’m going to go with A.

I think it has something to do, and since Martha liked it, it reminded her of her daddy.

It did.

Where’s our dinner bell?

Yes, indeed, it is A.

Absolutely, it’s A.

If you put the big pot in the little pot, it’s kind of like stretching the impossible.

Basically, you’re taking the soup and you’re making stone soup out of it.

Although the interesting thing about this expression, putting the big pot in the little pot, is that later, much later in the life of the colloquial expression, it came to mean just to really put on a big to-do, like make a really extravagant meal for people.

So you’ll find it used in even literature today, you’ll find people using this to kind of bring across that color of country life or rural America.

So that’s it, Valerie.

Thank you so much for playing today.

I think you did very well.

Yeah, you only missed one.

Out of all the questions.

I’ll work on those clues.

I always try to leave a little tip off there that I’m goofing on the clue, but sometimes I guess it doesn’t come through.

Well, thank you for letting me play.

I enjoyed it a lot.

And hey, by the way, for playing slang this today, we’re going to send you a copy of Grant’s book.

It’s called The Official Dictionary of Unofficial English.

Oh, boy.

All right, Valerie, thanks a lot.

All right.

Thank you, guys.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

If you have any questions on the air, call us.

The number is 1-877-929-9673.

Or send us an email to words@waywordradio.org.

Hello, you have A Way with Words.

Hello, this is Lynn from Iowa City.

Hiya, Lynn.

Welcome.

Hello, Lynn.

Well, it’s great to be here.

I have a question that you might help me with.

It’s a bit delicate.

There’s a term that we used to use when I was a kid that definitely is ethnically offensive.

And I don’t want to use it again, but I would like a good, colorful substitute for it.

And that term is “Indian giver.”

-huh.

And you used that to mean what?

It was always used to describe someone who gave something to somebody else, only to turn around a little bit later and take it back.

This is common behavior in small children, as you know, and it was often used as a gentle corrective.

We’d get the gimmes, and my mother might turn around and say, “Now, don’t be an Indian giver.”

I’d like to add that my mother is a lovely woman and has never knowingly uttered a slur in her entire life.

Yeah, but times have changed, haven’t they?

Oh, they sure have changed, and I wouldn’t do this again for all the tea in China.

But you know what’s really interesting about “Indian giver” is actually, when you look at the history of the expression, it’s more derogatory for the European settlers than it is for the Indians.

It turns out that the European settlers misunderstood the customs of the Indians, so the Indians had this ritual, the Native Americans, where they would give everything they owned to the other party and then expect to get it back with a lot of thank yous and I can’t really know that’s just too much.

But the thing is, the Europeans would say, “Oh, yeah, thanks,” and walk away with it.

The Europeans were nine times out of ten, the Indian givers, and not the Indians.

And the Indians, of course, later, if somebody walks off with your cattle and your wives, what are you going to do?

You’re going to go find them and get them back, because that’s not how the exchange is supposed to go.

Right.

Well, I’ve been thinking for about 30 years on this, because when my son was about two, I remember he behaved this way, and my brain took over as I was about to call him an Indian giver, and I said to myself, “I must come up with a good substitute for this,” because it’s a colorful phrase, it means something.

But I’ve been thinking about this for 30 years, he’s 32 now, and I haven’t come up with anything.

Wow, Lynn, 30 years.

Yeah, well…

What about smallpox blanket giver?

I came up with reneger, but that’s not right.

You wouldn’t use that with a small child.

No, you wouldn’t go there, although that word was used, reneger, was used in the 17th century, but that’s yet another word that you certainly wouldn’t want to use now.

So what are we going to do?

I understand your dilemma, what are we going to choose here?

I was trying to come up with something, I actually made up kitty giver, but it has a nice ring to it, but nobody would understand what I meant.

Yeah, I’m not sure kitty giver is…

Kitty giver with Ds?

Yeah, yeah, because it describes small children behavior, really.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah, absolutely.

I’m glad to hear that there’s actually no reason to attach that particular behavior with Indians.

Oh, definitely.

Definitely.

So you mentioned “gimmies” earlier, I’m thinking maybe “gimme giver” or something, which sort of sounds like “Indian giver,” almost.

It’s not a heartfelt gift, right?

If somebody gives you something and then takes it back, they don’t really mean it.

They’re looking to get both the praise for the gift and the gift itself.

But I think “Indian giver” has this concrete meaning to it, there’s really something that you give somebody and then that you get back, and a lot of these other things can be used for, just for promises and that sort of thing.

Yeah, well, you know, this may be something that we ask our listeners to pitch in on, because I don’t think we’re coming up with the right word for it.

Well, Martha, I think you’re right, we’ll throw it out to the listeners.

Listeners, if you’ve got an idea on a synonym that we can use instead of “Indian giver,” we’d like to hear about it.

The email address is words@waywordradio.org, or call us at 1-877-929-9673, or sign up on our discussion forum and you can leave your comment there for everyone to read.

How about that, Lynn?

Sounds great to me, thanks.

All right.

All right.

Thank you so much, Lynn.

Bye.

All right, bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Boy, that’s a toughie.

Yeah, I don’t have anything on that.

We would want to say “European giver.”

No, then they think you were giving them leather pants.

Yeah, I kind of like your smallpox blanket giver, that’s nice, I like that.

It’s too long, though, it doesn’t really work.

I mean, it’s funny as a joke, but it’s just too awkward to say.

Yeah, but boy, I sure grew up with that term, “Indian giver and gypped.”

The Indian giver gypped me, I mean, all those terms.

The stuff you learn as a kid that is just, as an adult, you blanch to think that it came out of your mouth freely as a child, right?

Yeah, and then I blanched to think of all the things that went into my mouth, like Twinkies and stuff like that.

That was just last night, too.

Anyway, that number again is 1-877-9299673.

The email is words@waywordradio.org.

Hello, you have A Way with Words.

Hi, this is Matthew calling from Princeton, New Jersey.

Well, hello, Matthew.

I have a question for you about the word “campus.”

Did you be near a campus there in Princeton, New Jersey?

Believe it or not, I am on the Princeton University campus at this very moment.

Oh, wow.

Wow, that’s like layers upon layers.

It’s like the cream of wheat box, you know, where you see the image of the guy on the cream of wheat box on the cream of wheat box.

Never mind.

I’ve never eaten cream of wheat, I’m afraid.

Never mind.

So what’s up?

Well, I’m an undergraduate here at Princeton, and on Saturdays I give tours to visitors.

And one of the anecdotes that guides are supposed to share goes like this.

It is believed that the word “campus” was introduced to the English language by Princeton’s sixth president, John Witherspoon.

President Witherspoon, who was accustomed to the urban universities of Scotland, was struck by Princeton’s rural setting, where the college’s grounds consisted of a perfectly flat field with no enclosures.

He decided that “campus,” which is Latin for “field” or “plane,” would be an appropriate term to describe the college’s grounds.

And gradually this term replaced the word “yard,” which had previously been in vogue, at colleges across the colonies.

Of course, Harvard always being somewhat behind the times, insists on continuing to call its campus a yard.

So my question is, does this story have any truth to it?

I mean, the explanation of the words coming from Latin is correct, but do we have any evidence that the term “campus” actually originated at Princeton in the late 18th century?

Wow, awesome question.

What are you studying there, Matthew?

I’m a religion major, so I study the history and anthropology and philosophy of religion.

Very good.

I want to ask if you’ve ever taken a Circle Line tour around Manhattan.

These are the boats that you pay for, and they take you around, and there’s some guy with a microphone telling you things about the buildings and the shores that you’re seeing.

You’ve ever done that?

I have not, but I’ve always wanted to.

The reason I ask is because you’re describing walking around campus, telling people facts and things, reminds me of that.

And I did that once with my parents, but 10 years ago, I did the Circle Line tour.

And the guy was talking such rubbish, I almost climbed up there and yanked the mic away from him.

But this is, these are the kind of facts that he was spouting, and some of it was true, some of it was provably false, and some of it was dubious, but you couldn’t prove it either way.

And campus, you think might actually be, do you think it’s true, or do you think it’s false?

Well, I mean, if it’s false, then that means that some Princetonian in the past fabricated the story, which I can not even begin to tell them how that would be possible.

Oh, surely not.

Saints all.

Wow.

And so you don’t want to do anything unethical by promoting that story?

No.

And we always, I always try to do it by saying it is believed that this is the case.

You know, that sort of disclaimer, but I’m not sure if we know actually where the word came from, then maybe I shouldn’t even be saying that.

That’s very good.

That’s very wise to use that passive voice there.

It is believed.

That gets you through a lot, doesn’t it?

It does indeed.

Well, now, Matthew, you mentioned President, what was his name, Witherspoon?

Yes.

Has he been president in, say, the 1770s?

Yes, he was president from 1768 to 1794.

Wow.

Okay.

Well, you know what?

I’m always, always very hesitant about attributing something to one particular person.

And Grant, you are too, I’m sure.

Definitely.

But it looks like the first reference I see for it is in 1774 at Princeton.

Oh, okay.

I’m looking at the Oxford English Dictionaries as first used at Princeton, New Jersey.

Huh.

So, I don’t know if he…

It’s one of those really rare words that we actually know not only the origin of it, but the person.

Oh, okay.

That was President John Witherspoon.

I see.

How about that?

So, now, you can walk more proudly across the evergreen campus of Princeton as you spout these factoids.

Indeed.

I intend to do so on my tour tomorrow.

Well, Matthew, thank you so much for your call.

I’m glad that we were able to confirm that you’re actually telling the truth every time you say that.

Great.

Thank you so much.

All right.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

So, if you have a question or comment about language, give us a call.

The number is 1-877-929-9673, or email us at the address is words@waywordradio.org.

That’s our show for this week, but you can always call us with your questions about language.

The number is 1-877-929-9673, or send an email to words@waywordradio.org.

Our senior producer is Stefanie Levine.

Tim Felten is our technical director and editor.

We’ve had production assistants from Robert Fong and Dana Polakovsky.

A Way with Words is produced at Studio West in San Diego.

I’m Martha Barnette.

And I’m Grant Barrett, inviting you to join us next time, right here on A Way with Words.

You say either, I say either, you say neither, and I say neither, either, either, or neither, neither.

Let’s call the whole thing off.

Yes, you like potato, and I like potato, you like tomato, I like tomato, potato, potato, tomato, tomato, let’s call the whole thing off.

♪ Singing of my own ♪