MAWG n. middle-aged white guy. (source: Double-Tongued Dictionary)
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This is my definition of a MAWG:
What age makes up a MAWG?
A MAWG of a middle-aged man, between 45 and 50, not always hip to what’s going on, who doesn’t look or feel hip due to what is happening to his physical appearance.
His stomach grows bigger due to
exercising little or none at all.
His hair falls out, strand by strand, due to frequent worry
over losing his inner youth to wasted possibilities and opportunities.
His face ages quick out of watching his inner youth back out, never to be restored again.
A MAWG feels, looks, becomes
middle-aged due to never thinking
about keeping his inner youth
alive through exercising and eating right, listening and watching for anything and everything hip, looking up to God
to help him look, feel and stay alive and youthful.
If a man doesn’t become a MAWG,
he must be hip to what he sees,
feels, tastes around him in music,
fashion, books, renewing his inner
youth by experiencing it the first
time.
He must keep his eyes and ears open, talk with anyone from a college student to a seasoned hipster, not feeling the effects
of MAWGdom.